Skip to main content

Croup


I keep saying Denny was the BEST dad. And I’m not just saying that. He actually was. I always told him this, but now I can brag about it on social media all I want. He was there for almost every doctors appt. Whether it was a “well check” or a visit because of a fever, he would go with us or meet us there. If a baby was sick he would do everything in his power to come home early or take off work. He hated seeing the people he loved in pain. Especially me and the two girls. If Winnie just wanted to be held all day, he would sit and snuggle her and watch whatever movie she wanted for as long as she needed to rest (even Barbie). He was taking two hard core medications that suppress your immune system (Crohn’s) but he never seemed to get sick. So he was always taking care of the rest of us. Winnie was coughing all night last night and Piper started this morning. They both have Croup with Stridor. Most kids get Croup at some point I think. It’s not that big of a deal. But for us it is. Now I have two screaming kids who want me to hold them. They both cry and that makes their throats hurt more and makes it harder for them to breathe and that freaks them out and causes them to cry more... But it’s not easy to hold two screaming feverish babies all night and then all day after not sleeping. Thank goodness for my sister who stepped in to help this morning. So I know that lots of single parents deal with this, right? Gosh it sucks. And my heart hurts for all of the single parents out there. But there’s something that stings a little extra when I think about the fact that Denny chose to leave us. Does that make sense? It’s not like I’m mad. And I know, I know, I have a right to be. I’ve heard it lots of times. I’m not mad. But I didn’t choose this and he chose it for me. So it stings. And it just makes me so so sad. We were such good teammates. We were a good pair of parents. And I know he wasn’t in his right mind. And I’m sure he’s hurting for us right now having to watch all of this and not being able to physically step in and help. It hurts my heart. I’m sad for us to not have him and I’m sad for him because I know he wishes more than anything right now he could just hold his girls.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Denny’s Obituary

Dennis George Bates II 1983 ~ 2019 Dennis “Denny” George Bates II unexpectedly took his own life on March 23rd, 2019. He was born in Ames, Iowa on October 14, 1983, to Esther Bates-Baker and Dennis Bates. Denny was raised in the small town of Mount Pleasant where everyone knew him and his funny, eccentric personality. He had six siblings who adored him, just as he adored them. As the eldest brother, he took it upon himself to tease and annoy these siblings as much as possible, but he would loyally protect them from anyone else.  Growing up, Denny played the trombone, was on student government, and was the life of every party. He sang in the top choirs in school, played soccer for a season, and was an Eagle Scout and a Seminary graduate. He began college at Iowa Wesleyan University, then moved out to Utah and completed his Business degree at Utah Valley University.  Denny spent the last 15 years here in Utah, making friends everywhere he went. He was someon...
Post a Comment
Read more

Friday to Saturday

It was weird how soon I knew something was off. Denny was never late to anything. He would always say, “If you’re not ten minutes early, then you’re late.” He would even get annoyed when we were first dating if I would show up late (which I did frequently) and would try to hide his frustration. He didn’t hide it well. Fun fact: I was 45 minutes late to our outdoor wedding. Not kidding, one reason I was so confident in marrying him that day is because he was still so excited and happy when I got there. He wasn’t even kind of annoyed. He was just so excited to be married to me.  But on that Friday, I knew by 8:01am something was off. Actually, I remember him leaving early in the morning, but he told me on Thursday that he was going to the gym the next morning. So I woke up just as he was leaving and rolled back over and went back to sleep. When Winnie woke me up with a Diet Coke (the only good thing about that day was her running in with a can yelling “Good Morning”) at 745...
1 comment
Read more

Friday

4 weeks ago, at this moment, I was trying to remain calm. I had driven all over Utah County and asked places Denny frequented if they had seen him(Denny is hard to miss unless he’s in a crowd of tall people, then you can’t even see his head). I called his best friend, his mom, and his brother. I called his boss and a secretary from his work to tell them he may be late and to let me know the second he gets there.  Earlier that week he’d shown some signs of stress. But, if you know Denny, he gets stressed out all of the time. He would have a less than average month at work and threaten to quit (though he never actually followed through and we had this conversation 40,000 times). His best friend and I always teased him about being a bit of a Drama Queen. 95% of the time he was even keeled. But then he had that 5% that was over the top. Stressed out Denny was a familiar one.  The stress from work came because all Denny ever wanted was to protect and provide for his fami...
Post a Comment
Read more